Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Pediatric Cancer Awareness Month

Not many people are aware of this, but September is Pediatric Cancer Awareness Month. As a mother with a child currently going through chemotherapy, I thought of many heart wrenching facts and stories I could tell you. But instead, I am going to post a story I wrote a year ago. It was originally written for a writing contest on pixnpens.com for the theme of cancer. It captures what I went through at the beginning of my son’s cancer journey, and I hope you enjoy it.

Casey by Stephanie Craig

I tried to get Casey to fall asleep, but I failed. Fear and anxiousness were keeping both of us awake. The white, sterile walls brought no comfort as I looked around the room for a clock. It was after midnight.
“Happy Birthday Baby,” I whispered into my son’s ear, knowing nothing about this birthday would be happy. My, now, 2-year-old son grasped me tighter as I, again, tried to rock him to sleep. My tears were getting his hair wet, but I could not stop them from coming. His face was buried in my chest, and I noticed him trembling. He was crying too.
The doctor came back into the room with the blood test results. “Leukemia,” he said. I tried to listen as he did his best to comfort me with statistics and stories of hope. But all my mind would hear is “Cancer.” My 2-year-old boy had cancer.
The doctor was interrupted by nurses coming in to take more blood and do another set of vital signs. I was relieved because I did not want to hear from the doctor anymore that night. But the relief was short lived when I saw the fear in Casey’s eyes. He had already been poked and prodded too many times in the previous 12 hours. Now they wanted more, and he was not ready to give in to them. The nurses had to physically restrain him as they did the blood draw and got his vital signs.
Casey was trying to fight them even more under the restraint. His head was thrashing around, and he was screaming. He stopped when he saw me. “Momma,” he called and looked into my eyes. His two-year-old brain could not form the words, but his eyes could communicate them to me. “Help me. I’m scared. Why are you letting them do this to me?”
When the nurses left, I was able to hold him again. As I cuddled him, I whispered, “I’m sorry Casey-boy. I’d take it away if I could, but I can’t. I’ll be here the whole time, holding you. When it’s done, you will be a better, stronger boy.” The words must have comforted him because he fell into a deep sleep, not even awakened when the nurses came for his vital signs again.
Sleep would not come for me as I wrestled with the emotions and questions I did not know how to ask. I looked to God, but no prayer could form on my lips. It was then that the Lord said to me, “I’m sorry dear child. I’d take it away if I could, but I can’t. I’ll be here the whole time, holding you. When it’s done, you will be a better, stronger person.” I felt His arm around me, and I finally fell asleep

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Before the Season Ends by Linore Rose Burkard


For my first book review I want to use Before the Season Ends by Linore Rose Burkard. Linore was a speaker at a recent Faithwriters conference in Livonia, Michigan that I attended, and she inspired me to start this blog and to start writing book reviews.
Before the Season Ends is written in Regency England (don't worry, I didn't know what the Regency Era was before reading this book either). The narration is reminiscent of Jane Austen, who lived and wrote books during that same time period. For those of us who have never read Austen before this book, it takes a chapter or two to fully get used to the narration used, which I call omniscient. But it is totally worth it.
Linore Burkard describes the clothing and setting in very good detail, yet it is not drawn out or flowery. In fact, Before the Season Ends is fast paced. All the chapters are written so that you want to read the next one. I stayed up until 3:30 a.m. reading, and was reluctant to put the book down when I realized how late it was.
Because Before the Season Ends is a Christian or an Inspirational book, there are some Christian themes in the book. Ariana Forsythe, the main character, is not shy about discussing her beliefs and talking to others about their beliefs. However, neither Ariana nor the tone of the book comes off as preachy (I have stopped reading a good Christian book before because they were preaching at me through their characters).
Before the Season Ends is full of romance and innocence. It left me wistful for times gone by, yet many of the themes presented are applicable for our world today. I am eager to read Linore Rose Burkard's second book in the series called The House in Grosvenor Square, which is already on bookshelves in stores or online at Amazon or Barnes and Noble. And I hope to post a review of it soon.
You can read the first chapter by clicking on this link. Excerpt PDF from "Before the Season Ends"

Monday, August 17, 2009

Nothing Can Stop God's Love

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,
neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth,
nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of
God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38 – 9 NIV



I won't ever be able to forget the events of that April day because it changed our family’s life forever. It was the day before my son’s second birthday, and we went to see the pediatrician because he had a limp after falling off a bed. We wanted to make sure that he was okay to play at McDonald’s PlayPlace on his birthday. But we never made it to McDonald’s PlayPlace because my son was in surgery on his birthday. As it turns out, the limp was not because he fell off a bed; it was because he had leukemia.

During the early days of my son’s leukemia journey, which we are still fighting (his type is a 3 – 3 1/2 year treatment), we sometimes sat holding his frail body, hoping and praying he would make it through the night. Then we had other problems, such as not being able to pay bills because I had to quit my job to take care of my son. We almost had our car repossessed and our electricity and water turned off because we didn’t have money. But those seemingly insurmountable problems never separated us from God’s love. In fact, He used those instances to demonstrate his love for us in tangible ways.

Of course God’s love is also apparent when things are going well. There have been times during my son’s battle with leukemia, where my son doesn’t even seem like he’s sick (such as now). God uses these instances to demonstrate His love for us too. Sometimes He has done this in tangible ways like letting me go to the Faithwriters conference when I had no money. Other times it has been revealing truth to me that I need or just a “spiritual hug” for no reason.

Romans 8:38 – 9 talks about this very concept. Nothing separates us from God’s love, and He never has failed to fulfill His word. His love has surrounded our family when everything was going well, and His love penetrated us when things were going horribly wrong. So I am certain whatever the future brings us, good or bad, God’s love will accompany us through the situation.

This post is a part of Monday Manna hosted by Joanne Sher on her blog An Open Book at http://joannesher.blogspot.com/ There you can fine Joanne's and other blogger's thoughts on the same Scripture used here, Romans 8:38 - 9.

Happy Birthday to Me!!


Today is my 32nd birthday!! I know some people aren’t excited about their birthdays, for reasons I cannot explain, but I am very excited. God has given me another year on this earth. And I am one year closer to being in God's presence for eternity. To celebrate, I am going to give praise to God for just a few things that He has done in my life this past year.



  • Today, I am closer to God and have come along a lot further in my spiritual journey than I was a year ago.

  • I have two sons who love me no matter what.

  • My son Casey is doing very well in his leukemia treatment.

  • My son Ryan is healthy and growing so fast.

  • I have a great Bible study, and I grow closer to Him because of it.

  • My husband loves me still after all these years (it has to be a God-thing because I can be such a brat).

  • I have great online friends that I met for the first time just over a week ago.

  • God has a purpose for my life.

  • God used me to bless people.

  • God has never failed me even though I failed him.

  • Christ died for me, and I get to be in God’s presence even on this earth because of it.

There is so much more that I am thankful for. It’s been a hard but great year. Hopefully next year I can bring more praise to God for what he has done.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

My Calling

As a teenager I wanted to be in professional ministry. I heard speakers again and again talk about the greatest honor in life is to be called by God into professional ministry. I wanted to be so honored, and I waited for the call. But it never came.

So I waited while in college. And it still didn’t come. Then I just wanted a calling in life. So I asked again, but I didn’t find one. Again and again I asked Him. I read the Bible, I prayed, I tried reading “the signs”, I did Bible studies, and the calling still didn’t come. Years passed by and I lost the zeal for a calling and settled for mere existence.
But God didn’t want me to merely exist. He brought me to a place where I depended on Him. He brought me to a place where it no longer mattered that I had no calling. He brought me to a place where I desired Him, and I just was focused on Him. That’s when I received His calling. No, I wasn’t called to be in professional ministry; I am called to be a writer. So as I sit in my home with a keyboard under my fingers, I can now repeat the words of the Prophet Isaiah and say, “Here I am Lord, send me.”